Cerberus guild

by **Jpegg** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:21 am

An Australian, an Irishman and a Scouser are in a bar. They're
staring at another man sitting on his own at a table in the corner.He's so familiar, and not recognizing him is driving them mad.

They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs:
"My God, it's Jesus!"

Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint.Thrilled, they send him
over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a pint of bitter. Jesus
accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the
pints slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus
approaches the trio.

He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: "My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!"

Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager.
As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock.

"Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is
completely gone! It's a miracle."

Jesus then approaches the Scouser who knocks
over a chair and a table in trying to get away from the Son of God. "What's wrong?" says Jesus.

The Scouser shouts, "F*** off, I'm on disability
benefit!"

by **furydemon** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:36 am

hahaa JP - <3 you evil scouser lot...

by **Smacdevil** » Tue May 03, 2005 3:35 am

Funny

But what what is a scouser? o.O

by **Jpegg** » Tue May 03, 2005 4:36 am

Scousers are what ppl who live in Liverpool are called in UK. They are steriotyped as being robbers, shifty, car theives, house burglars, drug dealers... that kind of attached stigma

I'M NOT FROM LIVERPOOL DEMON !!!!!!

hihi... but I have a scouse accent, some say :oops:

by **furydemon** » Tue May 03, 2005 4:40 am

Ay ay calm down, I don't cuuure JP...

haha some say? you're a reet scouse lad... :twisted:

by **Jpegg** » Tue May 03, 2005 4:45 am

lol.... ok then

5 miles out of Widnes and 15 miles from Liverpool city centre. But scousers call us St Helens peeps, wooleybacks (pronounced wooleybacccchhhhhhhhs *que spitting and throat noises*)

Alright... alright... calm down

by **Flameforge** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:16 pm

Haha nice joke

by **Syriii** » Tue May 03, 2005 3:04 pm

Rofl....

Replace "scouser" with "chav" and you could start a riot near one of the towns round my way

Good one tho ^^ Will have to remember it

by **LilBurst** » Tue May 03, 2005 8:35 pm

I have read of this "Chav" phenomenon. We have similair creatures in the States

by **Selavi** » Tue May 03, 2005 9:05 pm

Nice holiday pictures Bursti. Wich one is you? :wink:

by **Stacibee** » Wed May 04, 2005 6:25 am

He he he, funny!

OMG, white boys thinking they aren't.............lol

by **Flameforge** » Wed May 04, 2005 2:27 pm

Haha

But where do these "chavs" come from? We have "bogans" in Australia but I think they're a bit different.

by **Syriii** » Wed May 04, 2005 2:31 pm

omg.. hahaha Icy Hot Stuntaz... I remember seeing pics of those idiots years ago lol

And chavs generally come from high crime, high unemployment, poor school areas. They're scum, and they need to be hunted down

Wearing, the burberry cap, gold sovereign rings (one on EVERY finger, sometimes 2 or 3 per finger), tracksuit bottoms, sports top (Rockport, Reebok, Nike etc etc) big thick gold chains, of the tackiest Argos kind of stuff. And even though Chavs seem like they are wearing £100's worth of stuff, they STILL look like the scummy thieving greaseballs they really are!

And don't get me started on the Chav girls........ hoop earrings big enough to step through, etc....

by **Flameforge** » Wed May 04, 2005 3:23 pm

LOL Syriii. But where are chavs? Are they British too?

by **Jpegg** » Wed May 04, 2005 4:42 pm

OMFG.... look at him there on the decks !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock:

He's got a face you could p**s on for a week :shock:

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