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Scousers

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 2:21 am
by Jpegg
An Australian, an Irishman and a Scouser are in a bar. They're
staring at another man sitting on his own at a table in the corner.He's so familiar, and not recognizing him is driving them mad.

They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs:
"My God, it's Jesus!"

Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint.Thrilled, they send him
over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a pint of bitter. Jesus
accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the
pints slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus
approaches the trio.

He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: "My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!"

Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager.
As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock.

"Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is
completely gone! It's a miracle."

Jesus then approaches the Scouser who knocks
over a chair and a table in trying to get away from the Son of God. "What's wrong?" says Jesus.

The Scouser shouts, "F*** off, I'm on disability
benefit!"

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 2:36 am
by furydemon
hahaa JP - <3 you evil scouser lot...

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 3:35 am
by Smacdevil
Funny :D

But what what is a scouser? o.O

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 4:36 am
by Jpegg
Scousers are what ppl who live in Liverpool are called in UK. They are steriotyped as being robbers, shifty, car theives, house burglars, drug dealers... that kind of attached stigma ;)

I'M NOT FROM LIVERPOOL DEMON !!!!!!

hihi... but I have a scouse accent, some say :oops: :oops: :oops:

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 4:40 am
by furydemon
Ay ay calm down, I don't cuuure JP...

haha some say? you're a reet scouse lad... :twisted:

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 4:45 am
by Jpegg
lol.... ok then ;) 5 miles out of Widnes and 15 miles from Liverpool city centre. But scousers call us St Helens peeps, wooleybacks (pronounced wooleybacccchhhhhhhhs *que spitting and throat noises*)

Alright... alright... calm down ;)

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 2:16 pm
by Flameforge
Haha nice joke :)

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 3:04 pm
by Syriii
Rofl....

Replace "scouser" with "chav" and you could start a riot near one of the towns round my way :P

Good one tho ^^ Will have to remember it ;)

PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 8:35 pm
by LilBurst
I have read of this "Chav" phenomenon. We have similair creatures in the States

Image

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PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2005 9:05 pm
by Selavi
Nice holiday pictures Bursti. Wich one is you? :wink:

PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2005 6:25 am
by Stacibee
He he he, funny! :P

OMG, white boys thinking they aren't.............lol

PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2005 2:27 pm
by Flameforge
Haha :) But where do these "chavs" come from? We have "bogans" in Australia but I think they're a bit different.

PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2005 2:31 pm
by Syriii
omg.. hahaha Icy Hot Stuntaz... I remember seeing pics of those idiots years ago lol :D

And chavs generally come from high crime, high unemployment, poor school areas. They're scum, and they need to be hunted down ;)

Wearing, the burberry cap, gold sovereign rings (one on EVERY finger, sometimes 2 or 3 per finger), tracksuit bottoms, sports top (Rockport, Reebok, Nike etc etc) big thick gold chains, of the tackiest Argos kind of stuff. And even though Chavs seem like they are wearing £100's worth of stuff, they STILL look like the scummy thieving greaseballs they really are!

And don't get me started on the Chav girls........ hoop earrings big enough to step through, etc....

PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2005 3:23 pm
by Flameforge
LOL Syriii. But where are chavs? Are they British too?

PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2005 4:42 pm
by Jpegg
OMFG.... look at him there on the decks !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

He's got a face you could p**s on for a week :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: